Time to Move?
Today on my long morning walk, a man who was doing lawn work outside his house began talking to me. And in search of a topic, I listened and entertained his musings. “I’m not from around these parts,” he said. “These are not my people,” he continued, as he glanced around this suburban Long Island neighborhood. “I don’t belong here. I’m a Midwesterner.”
I’ve often thought about not belonging here. Our neighbors are not really our friends; they’re nice people but not people we would choose as friends. The community is not particularly progressive or made up of many social activists. We wound up back in New York because that’s where I got into grad school years ago, and then my husband got into grad school a few years after. Then we moved to this particular neighborhood because it was ten minutes from the school I taught at for years.
The proximity of my school to this house was really wonderful then. I was able to return home to breastfeed my younger daughter on my lunch hour. It was a tremendous plus to be able to be so close to home if my kids needed me. We raised our two daughters here, and enjoyed being a 40-minute train ride into New York City, and a 20-minute car ride to the beach.
Our house has been a good house. It’s got a lot of places to hang out in, with a good backyard and front yard. We redid the kitchen right before the pandemic hit, and so we’ve been enjoying a fresh white kitchen with cool cabinets, subway tiles as the backsplash, new appliances, and an island with four stools. The new kitchen has been in constant use during the pandemic, needless to say.
But I’m feeling like it might be time for something really new. I’m wondering when is it time to move, and where would we move? Do most people really love the neighborhoods they wind up in?
Hmm... You've got me thinking. Anyway, if you're an introvert like me, you probably never feel like you belong anywhere, except within the confines of your home!
ReplyDeleteWow. I feel this. We've been living here - our first house - for almost five years knowing it would be just our first starter house. I'm definitely itching to leave, especially now that our second son will be entering the world at the end of May. Our neighbors, like yours, are nice people, but they don't go beyond a hello in return. Even if/when we attempt conversation. Everyone keeps to themselves, and we were hoping to build relationships wherever we set our roots. Hmm, you've got me thinking now!
ReplyDeleteI appreciated your post. We often wonder that too. Our neighbors are also nice, and we enjoy the small talk. But we would also love to talk with people who have more progressive views. But we are also not overly social, so we are not looking for a neighborhood party scene. Just a place to chat the same talk when we are outside. Though, as I type this, I wonder how hard I have looked for that. Haha.
ReplyDeleteThere are times I think about moving. During the past four-five years we found more and more division within our neighborhood. I imagine someday we will move, but to where, I don't know.
ReplyDeleteIsn’t it great when you write and one thought brings you to another and then....a major thought that could be the beginning of a major change in your life! Change is hard but also exciting! The challenge is knowing the right time for the change!
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